The highs and lows in your marriage are starting to take a toll.
You notice getting out of bed some days can feel like a struggle. The minute the alarm starts beeping in your ear the dread of your day sets in. You know your children need you, but it's like you can hardly breathe from the heavyweight sitting on your chest.
As you sit at your desk staring into the computer screen, you start to question your marriage. Like this can’t be my life. How did I end up in this marriage that feels so dull? I still love my spouse, but I can’t keep fighting when they aren’t willing to fight for me in return.
Should I stay or should I go?
It takes strength removing yourself from a toxic environment that is no longer supporting your well-being. And if it's affecting your day-to-day interactions, it will definitely start to seep into your relationships with your children, co-workers, extended family members, and friends. The guilt you feel today will continue to build until you decide what you need for yourself to thrive.
Staying in an unhealthy marriage does more damage than good for everyone’s mental and emotional well-being. It makes living arrangements complex while trying to be a great parent and put your best foot forward. When your spouse no longer respects you, then your personal self-esteem and self-worth can begin to crumble, leaving you emotionally drained. If you tend to find yourself distressed more than not, you may find yourself becoming reactive to situations you typically would brush off in the past. Or even ignoring your children who crave your undivided attention.
Here’s A Simple Checklist To Decide If Family Mediation Is For You:
Your spouse no longer takes your calls or responds to your text in a timely manner
You feel angry and defeated when you have a conversation with your spouse
You are unable to find a solution to the marital problems
You are experiencing days where you feel anxious or depressed because your needs aren’t being met
You and your spouse disagree on your children's extracurricular activities
You are avoiding your personal hobbies that used to make you happy
You and your spouse sleep in separate bedrooms
You are tired of living a dull, mundane life because your marriage has become routine
You feel ignored and disrespected by your partner when you express your concerns
You no longer trust your partner
You try to talk at dinner but it turns into a blow-out fight
You can remember the last time you and your spouse went on a date
You are living in a sexless marriage
Your children are showing signs of anxiety and distress
You feel alone at home majority of the time
Your children are doing poorly in school
You are experiencing traumatic triggers from your childhood
You feel stuck and can’t see the light at the end of the tunnel
You are starting to give up hope because no matter hard you try you aren’t heard nor understood
You would rather stay at the office then come home to be with your spouse
If you found yourself agreeing to most of the checklist, it's time to take a moment and reflect on the choices you are making today for yourself and your children. Marital discord and distress is something that should not be taken lightly as this can eventually repeat history, exposing your children to unhealthy relationships. If you and your spouse have reached an impasse in your marriage, consider family mediation to see if it’s worth trying to repair your marital differences or part separate ways so all family members can live in a healthy, loving environment.
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